being smug about smog

I've realized that every time glare down and take a big sigh for every escalade that motors by, I'm only breathing in more pollution. Killing myself softly.

the afterthoughts of Belize

So I went and came back only to be depressed by the gloomy end of maritime march weather. I was so happy there...

An update to the earlier list

1. no sleepling nets required. the dry season weather combined with the fact that our cabins were screened in was enough to out weigh the need for harmful permethrin chemicals to be on my face all night

2. the tape recorder didn't work. I chucked it behind a tree off an animal trail overnight and it just didn't work. its alright, I had no great expectations. the sound of 50 peccarie (wild boar like animals) moving through the bush toward the water as I hid low listening closely was enough to allow me to remember it forever.

3. I did sit on the ground and I walked everywhere without shoes and it was great. And I'm happy to report excellent onsite outhouse conditions. Probably better than most dorm bathrooms I've seen in Hali.

Only our bathrooms don't have lizards. My project was to research lizards and the first I found was in the outhouse. Leslie was screaming at me from the bathroom to get the net and I flew out of the cabin and almost caught it. I baited it for 2 days and nothing. She was named Latrina. I couldn't identify her because she was covered in outhouse dirt. ew.

4. The camera guide wasn't read. But with everything there, the beauty overcame my poor photography.

5. For the most part I ended up wearing a sports bra and bottoms. I procrastinate.

However, that crackhead turned in all my id to st pats and it was returned to me last week.

6. & 7. I ended up being more fearless than I though I would be. I surprised myself by the things I took on.

- swimming beside a 1.5 m width caribbean ray in the wild
- jumping off a 30 ft waterfall!
- not freaking out at the coral snake that slid past my feet

- I also enjoyed telling my paranoid mother every detail

8. I did bring back a couple of tiny periwinkles. I held back because I hate the idea of removing conch shells and such from the beaches. I also took home an allspice leaf that the guide picked off the tree at Altun Ha, the mayan ruins. I unfortunately left a pair of binocs in a citrus grove, a bottle of sunscreen that wore off me over the period of a week (and onto the reef), and I'm sure more than enough to disgrace the leave only footprints rule. damn.

9. Had the time of my life, and I'm going back straight away!

for you

when I blink my eyes slowly I'm daydreaming of you.

Customer Appreciation

Shopping during holiday seasons is one of the most splendid pass times. I dearly look forward to hitting up the local Walmarts and Shoppers as they stock their shelves full of themed chocolate and candy. But I wait a few days, of course, to let the damage settle in. After I'm quite sure some children have broken into packaging or some jackass has dropped stock boxes crushing precious foil covered figurines of santas, pumpkins, and bunnies I go grocery shopping. As I shamefully stroll through the asles browsing what I actually need (and I of course buy intact presents for my loved ones) I hopefully stumble upon broken chocolate merchandise. I pick it up and eat it right there. Quite often the package is broken but there are many intact wrapped pieces inside that grubby fingers haven't yet touched. And if so, I have optimal faith in our fantastic provincial medical plan. I understand the sick habit I harbour but I simply don't care. I quite enjoy eating food that I never paid for inside of a Walmart. Some people urinate in public, I eat damaged chocolate. However, I once finished an entire box of misty mints (that I had opened to have a few of and then pay for) while I was walking around a Walmart. I placed the box back on the shelf and headed to the check-out. It serves them right for having such a huge store!

"Well, I might as well fart!"

I am in the midst of researching the use of incineration as a method of waste management. I am bombarded by journal articles promoting the safety of using modernized technologies for the high temperature combustion of municipal solid waste and then recovering energy costs by using the exhaust to drive steam powered turbines for power generation (Lafarge tyre burning, anyone? - ps whoever labeled tyre fires as a source of sustainable energy deserves a metal for getting away with it). Apparently, the claim is that by combustion at incredibly high temperatures (above 1400 C)dioxins, furans, PAH's, PCB's, toxic metals, etc. are destroyed and then contained by state of the art air pollution control methods before being released as exhaust. The contained ash is then treated until it is deemed non hazardous which at that time is often used as an aggregate in road construction (leaching+runoff=?)or is better yet used as a daily cover over landfill waste. Most authorities in chemistry who have no affiliation with the operators themselves will contest that you cannot safely dispose of such chemicals as a mass because the process is too sensitive and when you create a solution to one problem you also create an interference with another. For instance, when dioxin levels were said to be destroyed at said higher temperatures, this only caused the formation of nitric oxides from N and O found in air. When in contact with direct sunlight, nitric oxide forms nitrogen dioxide which is the source for acid rain and smog. Modifying chemicals is a tricky business much like putting out a grease fire with water. While intentions are good, it may blow up in your face. And who approved the disposal of such waste in municipal landfill sites? Even if the ash is given a thumbs up for stabilization, mixing it with unsorted waste subjects it to god knows what. Plastics, solvents used in many household chemicals (many that you use in washing like your fancy shampoo), and spontaneous fire outbreaks could cause unpredicted chemical reactions with such harmful ash contents. I think that the addition of ash to landfill waste can be summed up to observing a shit load of unthinkable filth and then just adding more wretched dirtiness. Kind of like sitting in cold, dirty bath water and deciding, "Well, I might as well fart".

Intento aprender español.....

Was that even it? But who cares? I love it! My prof looks at me like I'm on acid when I try to speak but it doesn't matter. Who wouldn't have fun using THAT much punctuation? I practice while Rick is watching sports and can easily tune me out as I try to mimic the enthusiasm of that mexican bee from the Simpsons. Ahyayi-EEE!

straight to the gallows

Ever feel as though you're the last to figure out what's about to happen, and you're the fated? After my presentation yesterday I couldn't help the feeling of disgrace overwhelming me. I wasn't sure if it was me avoiding eye contact with them or the otherway around but it was there, that heaviness. I didn't hear myself the whole time but I'm almost positive that I didn't even complete sentences. An absolute horrid mess. Afterwards, I received no feedback and couldn't read my performance off of anyone's face. Kind of like that time you took your dog to the vet to be put down, only he didn't know it was happening. No eye contact for fear of revealing bad news. The prof didn't even look at me! "Poor thing, she's toast".